Sunday, February 8, 2009

Doing the Dishes

Around here we are still in the dark ages. We have no dishwasher. When we designed our kitchen I did not want to give up any of my drawer space nor did I think we needed a dishwasher because with just the two of us it would take forever to fill. On the few occasions that there are lots of us here, there are lots of people to do dishes!

When the grand-girls lived with us, it was quite a shock to their system. Paige said "I can't believe you don't have a dishwasher, everyone has one." They were used to loading and unloading a dishwasher. I gave them lessons on how to wash and dry dishes. I explained that this was how we did it in the "olden days." They still thought I should go out and purchase a dishwasher. I said "I now have three little dishwashers why would I need one from the store."

I should have taught them Far Guys Mothers way. First you had to clear everything away, plates were scraped and stacked. You could not begin until all the left overs were put away and the table was cleaned to accept the dried dishes. Then you began, and she had a very specific order, glasses first then cups, small plates, large plates, serving bowls, silverware. Those were all wiped with a white flower-sack dishtowel. Then you got out a terrycloth dish towel to wipe the pots and pans. She always washed, and would rarely let anyone wash for her. She always wanted to put the dishes away herself too. I tried to follow her rules, I always had to be reminded when to switch dish towels.

I was the eldest in our family, I learned how to do dishes at an early age. Make the soapy water in the dish pan, set up your hot rinse water pan and just do it..wash whatever you can, I always soaked the silverware for a long time, saving it for last. I had no rhyme or reason how I did the dishes, I just did them. Every night when I had finished eating I would start the dishes, if I got all the ones done on the counter and someone was still eating I would patiently wait at their elbow and as soon as they were finished I would grab their plate and silverware from them.

My Dad was my biggest help, he would often dry dishes for me, but if I lagged behind and there was nothing for him to dry..he would quit. Then I was stuck with whatever was left. My Dad came from a big family with lots of boys, so he learned to do dishes. I am not sure why my brother was not required to do dishes. Probably the same reason Far Guy never learned to do dishes. It was woman's work. I remember when that changed in our household....

I was eight months pregnant with Jennifer, it was August (1975) and it was about 100 degrees and we did not have air conditioning. I had a big belly, my back hurt, I had to lean way over to reach the sink, I had a mountain of dishes after supper one evening. Far Guy and Trica were outside, and I began to cry. I cried and washed and I cried and dried, Far Guy came inside and asked why I was crying. DUH? It might have something to do with the mountain of a belly I was trying to carry to term, or maybe, just maybe the mountain of dishes I am left with while you are outside where it is only 90 degrees and there is a breeze?? Well I guess I gave him an earful, and from then on he helped with dishes. I had finally stated my feelings..if you eat you do dishes. No exceptions:)

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

Good on you! My brother as well as his three sisters had to take turns doing the dishes - no exceptions. My mum always said, "I have four little dishwashers, so why do I need to buy one?"

Gosh - that would drive me mad! Nowadays, though, even though it is just her and my dad - they DO have a dishwasher!

Mary said...

Since I live alone now, I do my dishes by hand. By the time I fill the dishwasher they don't get clean anyway. It's kind of soothing and I never did like dirty dishes in the sink. When I grew up the sink and counter were always full of dirty dishes. We weren't expected to do them and it never occurred to me to try.

Unknown said...

I know you've been following my blog and you know the story on how Calvin washed dishes for my husband's mission team in Jamaica. We are so lucky, dishwasher or no dishwasher, it's still a piece of cake compared to the way they have to do it.
I'm like you, I chose not to have a dishwasher because I didn't want to give up any of my storage space. I don't regret it....I just roll up my sleeves and wash....it's not a big deal.

Coffee with Cathy said...

Love this! Some of the best conversations happen over dishwashing. Thanks for the reminder.

Jeanne Estridge said...

I am the middle child of seven children. I dried dishes for nine people from the time I was in second grade until I went away to college. My sister Rita was the washer, and if she completely filled the drain rack and ran out of room I had to finish by myself. Since I had a tendency to daydream, that happened a lot.

I don't care if I never wash another dish in my life!

Anonymous said...

running an inn.. we're always running a load of dishes :) tho when we were kids/teens... even tho we DID have a d/washer.. we'd run it once/twice a week, and for the most part hand washed... I'm still doing that.. .clean as you go.. Frankly, i find it cathartic... oops gotta go clean a toilet :)

gp in montana

Connie Peterson said...

Norm is actually washing dishes now that I am incapacitated ... but it's hard for him, among everything else he has to do. And he always claims I never DO anything around the house.

I have always felt bitter that women are responsible for dishes no matter what the situation in the house.

Glad you have help, now.

Moms Musings said...

I never got a dishwasher until I lived alone. Now I use it about once a month. It takes about a week to fill it and about three weeks to empty it. So I wash dishes by hand because I'm too lazy to empty the dishwasher. Doesn't make much sense.

linda m said...

Your childhood sounds like mine, we all took turns doing dishes. To this day I still do my dishes by hand. I have a dishwasher but don't think I have ever used it. When my daughter-in-law came to visit she had no idea how to wash and dry dishes. Oh well, that's the younger generation.

DayPhoto said...

Although this isn't about dishes, your story about being big bellied reminded me of when I was huge with our first child, I decided to take a bath, laying in the bathtub I stuck my big toe in the Faucet to stop the drip, my toe stuck, and I had to wait there until Terry got off from work because my belly was too big I couldn't bend up with my leg in the air. (giggle)

Linda
Faucet

DayPhoto said...

Although this isn't about dishes, your story about being big bellied reminded me of when I was huge with our first child, I decided to take a bath, laying in the bathtub I stuck my big toe in the Faucet to stop the drip, my toe stuck, and I had to wait there until Terry got off from work because my belly was too big I couldn't bend up with my leg in the air. (giggle)

Linda
http://coloradofarmlife.wordpress.com

Pamela said...

sounds much like it was when I was a kid -- except we had a horrible old kitchen and sink. I often think about the hard work my mom did in the most uncomfortable of situations.

(Dad thought if we had a roof over our head, that was sufficient.)