Wednesday, July 17, 2019

Wistful Wednesday: 1992

In 1992 our oldest daughter became engaged.  She was a Student at the time attending Moorhead State University.  They would be engaged for two years or thereabouts when they got married in June of 1994.

I took this engagement photo of them in 1992 at the resort on Straight Lake.  They went to the same High School and didn't particularly care for each other...then they met up again in College.

They would have celebrated 25 years of marriage last month, instead they are getting a divorce. 

It takes two to make a marriage work.  I will venture to say that there are two sides to every story and they are both at fault.

We are sad for our granddaughters...but we are thankful that they are young adults and not small children.

In the "olden days" we would say that the children come from a broken home.
Far Side

27 comments:

  1. I am so sorry to hear this. It's hard for everyone.

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  2. I am so sorry to hear this. You are so right when you say it takes two to make a marriage work. In a divorce there is never a winner. I will pray for your daughter. You and Far Guy are also in my thoughts and prayers as I know this is hard on you both also. Also praying for your granddaughters.

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  3. I really have no insight except that I do know that I was divorced also and years later I can say that it was a good choice as both of us and the kids moved on and are doing well.

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  4. I'm sorry to hear this. You're right that it takes two working hard to make a marriage work. In this case, it seems that there were frictions all along, if they didn't like each other in high school.

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  5. I'm sorry to hear this news. It's not an easy time for anyone who loves the two of them. Just recently a friend of mine is going through the same thing after 24 years together. I've spent of time with her, just listening and supporting her. I hope that all goes relatively amicably.

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  6. Sorry to hear this but these things happen , I to was divorced from my first husband as it got to a point where he became verbally and mentally abusive so I had to get out . Sometime people have no choice but I found my Papa and all is wonderful , he is kind caring and a very gentle soul , my kids are adults now and always did understand why I had to do what I had to do .

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  7. When children divorce it's very difficult for parents. You can only stand and watch things happen. There is grief for the loss of the family unit. Sometimes we just have to say that it's a better situation for everybody even if there are some very sad parts to the situation.

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  8. So sorry to hear this. It's hard on the whole family.

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  9. Sorry they are splitting up. It is a good thing the kids are not little, though. Divorce is rough.

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  10. Everyone is saying sorry to what can be the most liberating event in one's life.

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    1. Divorces don't entail "one", Jan... and I think that's what people are sorry for the most.

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  11. Awwwww... I'm so sorry to hear this. How disappointing to everyone, including the married couple, no doubt.

    My hubby & I have gone through tumultuous times quite often, during our 43 years of marriage. We got married at 19 years old and met at 18 years old. We came into adulthood together... became of a legal age to drink alcohol together.... started drawing Social Security together. Both of us are *nothing* like we were when we met. We are really different people from back then. So it's no surprise to me that once people approach 50 years old, they realize that what attracted them to their spouse years ago just doesn't attract them now. We all evolve, we change, over time. Sometimes our "new" selves are still drawn to our spouse but I'm guessing to say most of the time not. Some of us stick it out regardless.... out of commitment, religion, necessity, whatever. But the reasons to not get divorced seem to be gone from this day & age. Therefore people seem more apt to acknowledge what is and determine not to spend the rest of their years miserable. Unfortunately, divorce has a stigma and the children most of all feel that.

    I hope you can encourage your daughter to seek out counseling for herself and the children. It can do wonders in "setting the record straight" in their own minds and make the transition of this reality a lot smoother.

    Love, Andrea xoxo

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  12. How sad. So hard for kids of any age, but they will all weather it I’m sure.

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  13. As parents we just want our children to be happy. And as we age we don't like change in our lives especially when we are dealing with traumas ourselves. Our generation started the divorce ball rolling because we had the financial means to liberate ourselves from a bad marriage due to working outside the home, unlike our mothers who were more or less stuck due to financial dependency on our fathers. My parents fought a lot and this was hard for my two brothers and myself to cope with. I told myself I would never do that to my children. In this day and age it's not uncommon for couple's to decide to go their separate ways when they feel the children are old enough to cope. I pray that God's Will be done in all your lives so that peace and happiness can prevail.

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  14. I'm sorry for you, the children and your daughter and son-in-law. It's a difficult situation for everyone involved, even friends. So often people are encouraged to "pick sides" that can be devastating. Not to say that's what has happened in your daughters situation at all. I will be praying for your family.
    Blessings,
    Betsy

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  15. Oh so very sorry to hear about your daughter's upcoming divorce. These things are so difficult in families. I too am glad that your grandkids are a bit older although it's never easy, no matter the age. I am praying for everybody in your family through these difficult times. So sad.

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  16. I am sorry to hear about this. It is a difficult situation for all involved. I was divorced when my children were young and it was the hardest thing I have ever been through. Those were the days when you felt like you were almost "looked down on" to be divorced. I hope they will be able to arrange things to be the best for all involved especially the children - no matter their ages.

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  17. I am sorry for everyone concerned....and yes, there are always two sides to every story.

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  18. Not all marriages last forever which is sad but 25yrs is a good show

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  19. Oh, I'm sorry to hear that they are splitting up after so many years of marriage. Having a life partner is so important to me and it makes me sad when others don't have that. Hopefully they will both find happiness again.

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  20. I'm sorry your daughter and her husband are divorcing but, as you say, their kids are now grown. Almost exactly the same thing happened a few years ago when my second oldest daughter divorced her husband. She waited until their only son was done school. She seems a lot happier now.

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  21. It is what it is. I guess they don’t want to continue together and I hope it works out good for both of them. It is hard on all those who are family to see things becoming broken.

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  22. I hope it all works out as best it can for all involved. It's not easy, no matter the circumstances.

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  23. So sorry that you and your family are going through this. It's hard on everyone when a couple decides to part ways.

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  24. Sorry to hear about the divorce. Two of our children divorced. The situations gradually worked out for all involved. People change as they mature and what is right at one age is not always right further down the road. The time of parting is difficult for all the family and for friends as well. Over twenty years together means this was not a spur of the moment decision. Always praying for the best for you and your family.

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  25. I'm sorry. My oldest daughter and her husband divorced after 21 years of marriage. It has been hard on all of us, but mostly for the children, especially the youngest. I was divorced after 16 years. My parents divorced after 25 years of marriage. We all seem to get through it, somehow.

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Thanks for stopping by! I appreciate your comments! If you have a question I will try to answer it here. I no longer accept anonymous comments. Connie