Hark! Back! Issue # 5

Hark! Back! Is a look back at blogs that appeared in a now defunct blogging site before I started with blogger in September of 2008.  They are in no particular order. 

December 30 2007

Telephone Communication

The ways that we communicate has changed over the years. When I was growing up in the 1950's we had an old black crank type phone...our number was 12F12O, yes I remember that number but was it two shorts and a long or two longs and a short?  I met the telephone operator once, she sat in a little room off the General Store/Post office, she was quite old, looked cranky and wore a dress with huge flowers on it.  She sat in a chair in front of a big board with lots of wires coming out of it.  It was the days of the Party Line, as I recall five or six phones were connected on a mutual line, you were only supposed to answer if your assigned number of short and long rings came through. If you answered any other time or listened in to anyones conversation it was called rubbernecking.

Later on we got a regular dial phone, but we were still on a party line, we had to be careful and listen before we dialed, or you could interrupt someones conversation.  I still have a phone with a dial, the Grand kids are amazed they think it is an antique...but hey if the power goes out as it occasionally does when you live in the boonies  I can still use that old phone.

My how times have changed...cordless phones always getting misplaced that never happened when we had phones with cords. 

 Cell phones...everyone has one except us. Why? We live in part of Minnesota where there must be a lot of Iron Ore in the surrounding hills, we cannot get cell phone reception here.  We had one for a short time, but found it inconvenient to walk to the end of the driveway and stand in one particular spot to make a call.

Then came the Trac phone, I purchased one at Walmart in Detroit Lakes, thinking that when we were away from home we could use it. WRONG...you have to be able to get a signal to activate it and so it sits in the glove compartment.  Those were perhaps the most expensive calls I never made.

I used to get quite confused with all the people talking on their cell phones in the grocery store...then I joined the group...I just pretend I have a cell phone in my hand, hold it up to my ear and talk to myself, heck I even answer myself sometimes and giggle!

Have you noticed that you hardly ever get to talk to a real person anymore?  It is all automated press one or two, listen for options, listen for options again and select, then...your call is important to us...please wait...your call will be answered in the order it was received...your call is being monitored for quality control purposes and then some person says ..."Hi this is Happy, how may I help you?" Well you have to repeat your name, address and phone number again...then Happy says " Please wait while I access your information" THEN the music starts, well you can bet your life's savings that it is not going to be the Oldies.  I want options for my music...don't give that classical junk that is supposed to sooth my frazzled nerves...I want to press one for "I don't get no satisfaction" press two for "Eve of Destruction" ...then I start praying that the power won't go out because I am on a cordless phone:)

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Update...we did get cell phones and in 2024 we gave up our land line.  Far Guy got a Cell Phone first and I succumbed shortly there after.  I am not fond of phones and occasionally I forget to turn mine back on after I turn it off!  I often lay it down in one room and forget where it is until someone calls me...and not many people have my cell number!  

The old switch board that I recalled as a child from the Osage Telephone Company was donated to the Hubbard County Historical Museum.  

I am still aggravated by the press one or two and in some cases never talking to a real person.

Far Side

Boosted again and other stuff

 We both had our Covid Boosters on Thursday afternoon.  We are both feeling fairly crappy; muscle aches, tired and very sore arms.  We are happy to have it behind us again.  It is supposed to be a rainy couple of days so it is a good weekend to spend resting up, napping and watching tv.  I wonder if we will have to get these boosters the rest of our lives?  It had been 7 months since Far Guys last booster and 5 months since mine, now we are on the same schedule anyway...misery loves company.

Cross something off our list. 

We got rid of our telephone land line over the winter, can't say I miss it.   When I don't want to talk to anyone I turn my phone off or leave it in another room and if it bugs Far Guy he can answer it. 

I am watching Tournament of Champions a cooking show and Downton Abby.  At night Far Guy and I have been watching The Repair Shop.   It doesn't take much to entertain us. 

We miss Little Elvis and Sadie and maybe even Phoebe the cat a little.  Our reasons not to get a dog outweigh the reasons to get one.  No fence, skunks, porkypines, raccoons, burrs of all kinds, deer and dog ticks are high on the no dog list...all in exchange for companionship and laughter.  We can always go Up North and visit Little Elvis and Sadie and anyways Baxter seems to like us a little.

Sadie catching snowflakes one day this week.   Photo by Jen. 

It seems Sadie misses her "daytime" company...namely us! 

Far Side

Busy Thursday

My Dad and I were total losers at Bingo, but we still had a good time

Had a weird thing happen in the morning...still cannot figure it out.  My phone rang while I was at my parents...It asked if I wanted to join the Facetime phone call between my brothers, sister and myself...so I joined...  who knew that four or maybe even more people could see each other and all talk.  My other baby brother said his phone rang and he got the same message as I did...and my baby brothers wife said the same thing.  She answered my brothers phone...he was in surgery getting a new knee.    No one knows who initiated the call???  I didn't even know how to hang up...my other baby brother was laughing because he didn't know how to hang up either.  Eventually I think everyone hung up on me.

Anyways my baby brother has another new knee...he was up and walking last night and should get out of the hospital today if all goes well.

I shoveled snow over at my parents...it snowed in town just enough to make things slippery.   Far Guy was delayed at the infusion center so I managed to squeeze in a visit to the yarn shop.  Yarn may have been purchased.

We are done with appointments for the week! I went in for my blood draw after dropping off Far Guy at Pulmonary Therapy.  Later in the day my blood work came back and I am normal...even my cholesterol...how about that!

Pretty roses at the grocery store.

Far Side

Wistful Wednesday : I gave in

I will admit it.  I gave in and joined the eye phone crowd.

I prefer this old phone.  Telemarketers don't know this number...but they sure know the eye phone number.

I asked Jen to pick me out a phone after Far Guy was in the hospital the last time.  I was travelling back and forth and he had his phone with him at the hospital.

I don't know what the fancy smancy thing will do...but it will call a few people....and I can always count on the unknown number to call me between 9 and 10 AM. 

Far Side

Entertainment

The phone rang.  Far Guy said “It’s for you so you might as well answer it.”  He cannot stand to let the machine get it…

It was a fellow with a foreign accent.  He asked “You were having problems with Windows 10 how are you doing now ?”  I replied “Fine”  “So no problems?”  “Nope I threw it in the garbage!”  “What?”  “ Garbage…G A R B A G E where it belonged.”  “What did you do with it?”  “I threw it in the trash TRASHH.”  click

A fine howdy ya do that was…at least he could have thanked me for my time and said goodbye…but just click…where were his manners?  I suppose he just wanted to fix my computer over the phone and charge my credit card.  ( I still have Windows 7…and hope it lasts a bit longer…Far Guy has Windows 10.)

Far Guy was laughing the entire time…next time he is answering it.  Since we don’t have caller id on our land line it is anybodies guess who is calling us…the next time the phone rang Far Guy answered it and it was my other baby brother.

Other than phone calls our biggest entertainment is the snow and old movies on TCM. I watched a really good one called The Search.

Call me

Call me anytime….not before eight or after eight.

If I can hear the phone ring I will answer….so call me anytime!

Not sure of the number…but you can call me anytime.

My kind of phone.

This old phone still needs a cover on its receiver and the cord is frayed but we decided that the frayed cord gives it character.  This phone was patented in 1900 and 1901.  Far Guy cleaned it up with Murphy’s Oil Soap…there was at least 116 years of grime and dirt on it.  This original sticker is still intact, if we had refinished the telephone we would have sacrificed the original sticker so we chose to just clean it up.

Grumpy

Catbirds are not much to look at.  However they sure can entertain you with their sounds and songs.  We have one..maybe two in the yard..mostly they sound like cats in a tree…grumpy cats in a tree.

Gray Catbird

I have a hooded sweatshirt that says “Grumpy “ on it.  I usually wear it on School Tour Days.  The Dwarf that is named Grumpy is also on this shirt.  40 kids were through the museum on Wednesday.  One of the classroom helpers said “I need a shirt just like that.” 

I organize the tours, I split them into four different groups. 40 little squirming, can’t stand still, can’t shut up, runny nose first grade little darlings. I got stuck with the downstairs communications, medical, resort and high school memory room and the hands on fur and wool exhibit.  All the kids were freezing..some were shivering..and complaining that it was too cold to be downstairs. Ya..think?  Welcome to my world.

Most of them knew about Alexander Graham Bell inventing the telephone..but had no idea what a pay phone would be used for.  They also didn’t know what the word “disconnect “ meant.  Such as in “If you didn’t have more money to put in the pay phone the operator would disconnect you.” Perhaps they thought it meant you would be beheaded or something…I don’t know.  I was glad when their time was up. I was shot. They were a rowdy bunch.  One of the teachers just shook her head and said “It is getting near the end of the school year.” She looked like I felt.

Some teachers have wonderful control of their students and some do not.

I came home and crashed and Far Guy said “I think I feel good enough to work for you tomorrow so you can have the day off.”  What a doll!

So I had a day off yesterday, I had a Doctors appointment, she is changing my blood pressure medication yet again.  I did some shopping for the museum.  I stopped by the museum.  I took many museum phone calls here at home..gosh it is no wonder my blood pressure is up..I had a call yesterday morning before I was even awake for the day.  For those of you that don’t know me well or how much I hate the telephone ringing, we only have a phone in the house because Far Guy insists that a phone booth at the end of the drive would be very inconvenient for him.

Grumpy Female Baltimore Oriole:)

Far Guy did it!

Yessiree  he went and joined the 21st century.  He talked to Jen and she went out and got him a cell phone..she had a family plan and well since he is family he now has a cell phone.

I cannot give anyone the number because I cannot remember how she said to find the number..and I did not have a pen or a pencil to write it down..I suppose I could have scratched my arm until it bled and wrote it in blood but I figured that would be a little overkill and kinda messy.

So if I have to call Far Guy I will have to call one of our daughters or grandchildren to pass the message on to him..because they all have his number.

I borrowed it to text Madison the other day..I do know how to text…or I did the other day..maybe it was just beginners luck.   It took me twenty minutes the other day to call Trica..finally I got the call accomplished.  This contraption is supposed to have a voice operated system..I think maybe Far Guy and I should have it programmed that way…our grandson Noah has his phone programmed that way…so we will wait for him to visit.

I am not sure what Far Guy was thinking when he got a cell phone..but he does remember to take it with him. I do not answer it..heck I don’t even answer the phone at home unless he is gone. I answer when he is gone because he might just be calling to say “I Love you..don’t bother cooking or cleaning or doing that laundry..I will be home soon to tend to all those really boring jobs that you my princess should not be bothered with.”

What do I know how to do with it?  I can lock it and unlock it. There are no on or off buttons..no send..or hang up buttons..the numbers are really tiny too..who invented such a tiny phone with itty bitty numbers?

I can hardly wait until one day when he is at home and both of his phones start ringing at once.  His new phone  does tell him who is calling..is has cute little computer like voice that doesn’t pronounce Trica’s name correctly either. But he can send and receive calls from home inside the house..no more standing out in the middle of the yard or hanging out by the mail box trying to get a signal..progress comes to the boonies:)

More On Phone Calls

The other night Thursday to be exact..7:20 approximately. The phone rang, most of you that follow my blog know that I hate the phone. Well I don't really hate it..very strong dislike..may be a better description. It interrupts my thoughts, it requires my attention. I was tied to a phone for ten years..stuck with one in the Greenhouse because if I did not carry the phone and a customer called with a question..If Far Guy could not answer the question, he would have to track me down and give me the phone. Two people have now been involved in one phone call, it was just silly. So I took charge of the phone. I have often said that there are not stupid questions. BUT if someone calls me and asks me what in the world could be wrong with the plants she bought a WalMart or KaMe ApaRT.. that borders on stupid. You have no idea how much of a struggle it was for me to remain polite and ladylike.

I find it totally freeing that I can ignore the phone and not feel that I am losing a customer. I can put on my MP3 player with the headphones and not be bothered a bit by the incessant ringing. Escape..that's it.. I try to escape from the phone.

Back to Thursday...((Hugs to ANN..faithful blog reader)) It was a fairly stress filled day, I had turned down an invitation by my parents to go to Bingo, I turned down my chance at winning their new mega super dooper jackpot...and I really like Bingo. I wanted.. no....I NEEDED my time..and that would be my very favorite time of the week Thursday night from 7 to 8 to watch SURVIVOR. Sixty minutes of pure bliss stretched out on the couch...watching someone else trying to survive. Sixty minutes of total insanity..so that I can be sane. Sixty minutes of no phone calls, my daughters only call during the commercials. Far Guy is in charge of the phone....and he is a perfect phone answerer..except he can't lie and tell someone I am not home when I am. It was faithful blog reader Ann...Hey Far Side I read your blog, I know you hate phone calls, but I just had to tell you I almost peed my pants when I read your blog today..my sanity begins to slip slowly away. Goodbye sanity..Hello Ann.. we did have a very interesting conversation, and I did enjoy it..but I would have enjoyed it much more at 8:01.

Some people don't read my blog so they call when ever..my parents, and some of my computer challenged cousins. The people that know me well and read my blog love to irritate me, my brother, my best friends, my neighbors they all just call me anyway. There must be some strange contest they are involved in..how many phone calls will it take to drive her totally nuts..she is partially nuts already..perhaps it will be MY call that does her in. I wonder what the prize is...

Just so you know I am not above monitoring phone calls..but the girls talking to Chance usually causes me to stop and think .. "Hi Chancy, did they leave you home all by yourself again, do you know where they are..woof woof" Now when they start talking to the dog..I know they are really desperate and need their Mommy or Daddy. So I should really pick up the phone, shouldn't I? Nope if they are well enough to leave a message they are OK til later.

Just so you really know there is no escape..this house has no lockable doors. Far Guy built the door to the Bathroom..it has a Far Guy special lock..a piece of wood that slides over and locks from the inside, but the door shrunk and you can slip your finger in from the outside and unlock it. It comes in really handy for Far Guy when I am hiding in there and the phone is for me..he just opens the special "privacy lock" and hands me the fricking phone..:)

Friday Irritants

Well it is a lovely day..just lovely..

When you live in the "boonies" power failures happen. A really bad time for them to happen is when you are writing a long blog. My day began early. Some "stuff" had piled up that only I could deal with. Far Guys patience is limited.

I needed to call the Clinic, it seems like they had a problem which became my problem in the form of a bill. I called them and was put on hold (No Music), I hate being on hold. Finally I explained my problem. She was graciously sympathetic when she told me that all of my insurance information had been wiped out of their computer system. I asked "How did that happen?" She replied "I have no idea." Now lets see, you all know the drill, you have to verify your name, address, phone number, next of kin, and insurance information before seeing a Doctor. Now... do I have to ask them to verify my verification on my next visit? What kind of idiots work there anyway?

I had a note on my bulletin board..call to opt out. I have been getting many phone calls from a well known credit card company. I figured by opting out I could solve several problems, first the junk mail they send me may save a few trees. Second, perhaps the phone calls will end. The ones where they say they have a special offer of lower interest rates, but it is an automated call so you have to hold for the next available operator while listening to weird polka music. When I finally get the next operator, she learns that I never carry a balance over from one month to the next..she hangs up on me, no thank you..just a click.. So I figured five minutes of my time might reap multiple rewards. All the while I was wondering why do I have to call them to opt out, why can't they just considered me opted out..until I call them to opt in. Brilliant! But I never got to talk to a real person to share this thought with.

I had to call the individuals that bought the small greenhouse last June, they finally picked it up in August but there was a pile of steel and treated lumber that they would stop by for tomorrow or the next day. I politely left a message on their bloody machine, saying that I was concerned that their pile might be damaged by the men when they dismantle one of the really BIG greenhouses (supposedly next week). HELLO it is way past tomorrow and the next day has come and gone, and I seriously doubt that I will risk life or limb so that their "stuff" doesn't get run over by huge trucks and trailers. But just in case I take up the cause for them, I won't be blogging at all next week because I will be guarding their pile of crap, freezing my butt off all the while reading 'The Vagina Monologues" right out loud to all the creatures in the forest.

I had to get dressed really early this morning. ( I love my Jammie time in the morning..that sometimes lasts until afternoon) Some lady who missed my garage sale more than three weeks ago, was dying to see what I had left. She had an appointment for last Saturday and was a no show. Today she actually showed up, and will think hard about what remaining stuff she wants and will call me next week. I am so looking forward to her next phone call.

I had a really horrible experience this morning. I am thinking about shaving my head, Far Guy and I could match! Somehow one of my really long hairs got tangled up in my toothbrush. Ever since seeing that episode of Oprah's that revealed that fecal matter can travel in the air more than six feet and land in my cute little toothbrush holder and lodge in my toothbrush, I have kept my toothbrush in the drawer in a far corner of the bathroom. Unfortunately I also keep my hairbrushes in the same drawer.. so something has got to go..my hair or my teeth.. I will have to ponder that for awhile longer before making a decision.

As I write this the phone has been ringing..I used to get a number of trade magazines, no... I no longer want them..please, please take me off of your list... forever.

Thanks for listening.. I feel better now:)

Phone Calls

Sometimes the Telephone just drives me nuts. Since Far Guy would not allow a phone booth to be out by the end of the road, I am stuck with it in the house. Well I guess I need it inside the house for the Internet connection. We have a high speed connection using the "bottom" portion of the phone line. I do not begin to understand this technology. It works, and on the few occasions that it hasn't I do use the phone to call and complain.

I do not like to answer the phone. Far Guy usually does that dastardly deed. If it were up to me, I would let the answering machine handle all the calls.

Lately we have been getting some automated calls, one was from some warranty company. I love messing with these people. if you say "uffda" to everything they ask you..eventually they hang up on you. I was probably taken off their list..so sad. We get some non-profit calls, I tell them to send me the information through snail mail...and won't divulge my address. One time I won a trip to Branson, Missouri..imagine that... me a winner of a trip!! I asked him if there would be more than ten people in town and more than two cars on the road at the same time..he hung up on me too. Why do these people call me if they are only going to end up hanging up on me? Oh ya, it is probably part of their job, to place many calls, and talk to crazy old women. Now they have computer generated phone calls, I had one that said "You are a very important customer, please hold for our first available customer service representative" WHAT?? Why in the world is some company calling me to put me on hold? Obviously they are wasting my time, I wondered how many people are actually stupid enough to wait? And then there was the time that they wanted me to verify my credit card number..I suspect that they were crooks..first I told him that if he would tell me his then I would tell him mine. Finally I told him that I was so poor I couldn't get one of those chargy cards, didn't he know that when the bank gives you one of those chargy cards they actually want you to repay them? He then wanted to know if I did everything with cash..he was a nosy little bugger..and wanted my checking account number..he was definitely a crook...I told him nope, I don't trust the banks..so I do all my business with postal money orders..he hung up too. Now I suppose all the political phone calls will start, I will have to keep track..because those that irritate me by the greatest number of phone calls may not get my vote.

We are signed up for the do not call list, and I am still surprised at the number of phone calls we get.

Now some women seem to be joined at the hips with all their phones, cells phones and the new Eye Phones ( I still can't figure out how an eye phone works..I am truly puzzled). I am not a joined at the hip phone user.. on the few occasions that I am in a fairly good mood I will answer it..if you are the lucky recipient of my "hello what the heck do you want" then consider yourself really lucky.
I do enjoy the phone call that begins "Hi Gramma" now those are real phone calls:)