We picked out and paid for our final resting place. Our ashes will be interred at Linnell Cemetery in a plot across the walkway from my cousin Mark and down the row from Uncle Willard. The cemetery is just a mile down the road from where we live…it is a favorite night sky watching spot for me. Safe spot to park, quiet and a grand view of the entire night sky.
Linnell Cemetery is where Far Guys Maternal Grandparents, Great Grandparents and his Uncle Willard are buried. We chose Linnell Cemetery because the lawn is always mowed nicely…unlike Riverside at Osage…sometimes you could bale hay at that cemetery. Sad to say that the decision came down to lawn maintenance…but it did.
So we can cross something off the list.
I am working on my obituary. I wrote it before but that computer crashed, this time I will print out a copy. Far Guy has not begun to write his obit….he is dragging his feet.
There are certain things we have done.
Our wills are notarized and registered with the county.
Our Minnesota Advanced Care Directives have been filled out and our signatures witnessed by my other baby brother and his wife. The Clinic in town has the original papers on file and I have a copy.
We have discussed and noted special items that we own and who they should be passed down to.
Far Guy says “We can’t do everything, something has to be left for the mourners to do.”
I agree BUT some things should be done together before one person is left to make all the decisions.
We don't have the plots yet but have done the legal paperwork like you. I have made notes for my service but need to elaborate on the songs. I have 2-4 hymns I want compiled with a verse of each sung - - - UPbeat - - thank you. I don't want them drug out like a funeral dirge. I need to work on the obits cuz the kids don't have a clue about those who passed before us. One BIG thing - - I need to pick out the pictures for the digital collage. I am definitely not leaving those for them. It worries me what they might select! I think the mourners have enough to do so won't leave them much - - - - other than cleaning out the house - - hahaha. That in itself will take some time even if we have been paring down. You are smart to be prepared.
ReplyDeleteHubby and I have done all that already except pick out the plot. I don't want to be buried. I have asked my son (who loves climbing mountains) to please scatter my ashes from the mountain of his choice. Hubby wants a plot but since we may move we haven't picked a cemetery yet. I don't think leaving anything to chance is a good idea. And I sure do know what you mean about lawn mowing at the cemetery. The cemetery where my parents are buried is a disgrace. Glad you got all that out of the way.
ReplyDeleteSuch organization - and forethought. A friend of mine still shudders from her duty as serial executor for family members. It can be a colossal task.
ReplyDeleteWe do already have our plots - I think they were bought in a giant block long ago by my husband's family. I have mixed emotions about being buried with some of them and it's not my favorite cemetery. It's well maintained but so boring. All the stones are the same, square rectangles flat to the ground.
I've checked all those items off of my list, too.
ReplyDeleteFremont County has a cemetery tax, so the grounds are maintained in all the public cemeteries. I cannot bear to see an unkept cemetery.
You are more organized than me!
ReplyDeleteThis does make it much less stressful for those remaining. I see many bad decisions made because this is a highly emotional time. I'm very proud you are thinking of your remaining family by doing this now.
ReplyDeleteGood to get that kind of thing done, right? I have not done an obit because I do not want one and they are not required by law. Good to have an opinion about how the cemetery is kept, though. That's important.
ReplyDeleteSeptember Virgo??? You are wise, though, to do this now. I've been a power of attorney and executrix three times, and it's not easy when all wishes have not been written down.
ReplyDeleteI agree - the more that is done the more helpful it is.... many years I assisted those left behind with paperwork and sometimes with estate items (it is a lot of work) ~ that seems to be the cemetery of choice (it is very nice).
ReplyDeleteI think you have done a wonderful thing for your family. Having been through the opposite -- nothing planned, nothing done, no clues left to what was desired -- I will do the same for my children one day soon.
ReplyDeleteWhen we decided to pick out our plots the kids all decided they wanted plots right by us. So now we have a Brown family are of plots!
ReplyDeleteLinda
http://coloradofarmlife.wordpress.com
https://coloradofarmlife.wordpress.com/sherlock-boomer
I am one who does not make many plans for the end. I know where I want my ashes spread. I have some of the things done on your list. Maybe I'll borrow your list. I like Far Guy's attitude.Leave se jobs for the mourners. Oh yah , I'm not having a funeral or memorial.
ReplyDeleteWe have it all taken care of , just sitting here and pittle waiting on God .
ReplyDeleteWe haven't done any of it yet but I did tell Papa that if I go first just put me in the back 40 in the open fields near the woods so I can enjoy the nature and the night sky's and have the sun shine down on me to ! lol ! We like the night sky's to as we both enjoy Astronomy and have a few telescopes . A bit morbid but it is something we all have to do and think about eventually isn't it ? ! Have a good day !
ReplyDeleteYou blog reminded me that my father in law gave us directions to where we were going to be buried and the color of the stone to match everyone in his family. We both are enough of rebels to go find someplace else. It is unnerving to have people plan these things for you so they will make their family look good. Looks like you have a suitable place to see the stars.
ReplyDeleteA final resting place is something Poppy never wanted to talk about. Now that my sister and I know that we have three plots along side Daddy's grave it takes away some of the worry, for me anyway. Glad you got that taken care of. :)
ReplyDeleteBoth of us will be scattered to the wind on the farm where I grew up. No cemetery lot, no casket, etc. And my hubby says we will just let my daughter do as she will (as executor) with all the stuff.
ReplyDeleteTrue - you are easing the way for those left behind.
ReplyDeleteI am IMPRESSED!!!! Your family will thank you for all the details you take care of and honestly I've seen too many families (including my own) torn by those things "left for the mourners". Kick Far Guy in the butt and make him get'er done! :)
ReplyDeleteI agree! We did the same thing a couple of years ago. Although now I am wondering if we should change the spot we chose in case other members of the family want to be buried in the little cemetery by us! Well, congratulations anyway on getting those important things done!
ReplyDeleteAs a frequent mourner, I agree with Far Guy: those gotta-have-something-to-keep-me-busy mourners appreciate having something constructive to do with their time then.
ReplyDeleteHowever, let's hope neither of you will have that on your to-do list for years to come.
Just yesterday Smart Guy and I went to a seminar to learn how to fill out our End of Life directives. We've had our wills for ten years but didn't realize until recently how important those Advance Directives are. Good for you both for doing this difficult but necessary task. A planner right to the last, you are! :-)
ReplyDeleteYes, that last line is the most important one. Doing it for each other--cause, odds are, you won't go at the same time. ;) Lawn maintenance would do it for me, too, BTW. :)
ReplyDelete